 My life truly has been changed forever. I have undergone a transformation in my life that will equate to instant success.
Fame, fortune, females, and a plethora of riches are sure to follow. One game has changed my life forever, and I owe everything to it. I am positive George Washington played it before he took down the British. I guarantee after thousands of failed attempts at inventing anything actually useful, Thomas Edison engaged himself in this game, thus creating the light bulb. Surely God spawned man and Earth from the basis of this game. As if you already didn’t know, I am referring to greatest thing since sliced bread: Diablo 2 Lord of Destruction. I know it gives me tingles too.
To the people that say Mario is the greatest game ever created, I spit at them. Who cares about a midget Italian with a porn star mustache that throws flaming fireballs? I mean what’s up with those stupid mushrooms anyway? Where do all those come from; they are all the same!?!? How do they reproduce? Loop hole my friends, loop hole. As for Donkey Kong, there is no debate. Jesus never played Donkey Kong; he sure played Diablo 2 though. Hitler and Bin Laden played Donkey Kong. You be the judge…
Frankly, I don’t even feel worthy to talk about Diablo 2 Lord of Destruction. When addressing such, you may only refer to it as D2 or Diablo 2 Lord of Destruction. Otherwise, you are smited by God. Anywho, D2 is the manifestation of heaven in Compact Disc form. It is perfect in every way. Frankly, Diablo 2 Lord of Destruction is symbolic of the journey through life. You start as a level 1 n00b where big bad level 85s torment and make fun of you. BUT, just like gaining experience in life, you gain experience in D2. Soon enough, at level 86, you take out all those 85s that wouldn’t give you a G-rush. You grow from infant scrub to the CEO of Pain. There really is no greater feeling than to succeed in Diablo 2 Lord of Destruction. It isn’t about the fame, or all the girls you can get from being the best. It’s about the journey. To acquire that elusive Jah rune is like having your first child. You work your whole life for it and you finally get it. And boy, is it something to be cherished. I cried and cried when I got my first Jah rune. I loved it more than myself. My level 91 Hammerdin Paladin using Mage Plate Enigma is the crown jewel of my life. It is the epitome of my life and success.
Basically what I am trying to say is D2 is the greatest game of all time. The first time you play it you get that warm tingly sensation when you slow dance with your first girlfriend at the school dance in Middle School. Right by microwavable cheeseburgers, it is the greatest thing to ever be unleashed upon this earth.
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