Halfsie Americans have been marginalized over the years. However, as Tuesday showed us, actions speak louder than words. In electing Obama, America enthusiastically stated: “yes we half-can.” Halfsies may yet be restored to their once glorious throne. No longer will our white half get picked somewhere in the middle for pickup basketball, nor will our black half feel uncomfortable at country clubs and folk concerts. And no longer will the pictures of past presidents look only slightly different from us. Ah, a proud day indeed.

To say we’ve had it bad would not be completely accurate. No—we've had it half-bad. Halfsies have experienced the same prejudices and societal marginalization that blacks have. Yet, we have retained the white privilege that allows us to volunteer at nonprofits to help solve those wrongdoings.

We also know the guilt. Most white Americans know the severe emotional pain that comes from what is called White Guilt—crushing feelings of your own implicitness in slavery and subsequent disenfranchisement of African-Americans over the years. But only halfsies know what it is like to feel Half-White Guilt—feeling guilty about enslaving and disenfranchising yourself.

No longer do we feel remorse about screwing ourselves. We can now, for the first time, call ourselves halfsies without people suggesting that we take medication. In this day and age, when women are calling themselves men, men are calling themselves women, and people who are so androgynous have no choice but to call themselves transgender, we should be able to proudly flaunt our dual natures.

Obama, my hybrid prince, I know you will do great things. A piece of advice in parting: the most important part of life is time with your family. Spend as many hours with your all-black wife and 1/4 white- 3/4 black children as you possibly can.

Halfsie Power!

All of my love (or whichever half of it you would like),

Condoleezza Woods.