Well TCM nation, here we are again, staring into the cold, dark eyes of an economic crisis.
The US banking system has collapsed (the result of mass fraudulent credit and subprime housing mortgages), the Big Three automakers have about six months to live, and the war on car bombings, road side landmines, and sand dunes continues as retardedly as ever. The national debt is the largest in history, and our president-elect has been apologizing in advance for the crazy spending he intends to make. China is kicking our ass, and the new season of Lost is going to suck. To summarize, we are fucked.
However, for every problem there is a solution (except for Pacman Jones and his obsession with pointing guns at everybody). The death of money in the US can be slowed, or even stopped, with the appropriate measures. Unfortunately, Congress’s current approach to handling the crisis is less than ideal. For example: shittily managed car-maker using prehistoric manufacturing techniques and staffed by thousands of overpaid and unnecessary low-performing union workers threatens Congress for a multi-billion dollar bailout or face the release of thousands of jobs, and Congress backs down. WTF. The car maker should take those billions of dollars and invest in new manufacturing techniques that are faster, cheaper, and more flexible. Cough Toyota Cough.
Clearly, huge bailout packages are not the best option. The US economy is in a tight spot, but here are the things I would do if I was in charge. First, the war needs to be ended. Duh. Second, people who do not have evidence of their income or debt records should not be allowed to get a loan from a back. Third, the government should learn from its mistakes (the first depression was caused by unbacked credit accounts, and this depression has been caused by loans borrowed by people with bad credit and who are unable to pay them back). Paying back credit seems to be a problem, so why not roll out some program that limited the amount of credit someone can have, or create more efficient ways to determine a borrower’s reliability to pay his loan back? And the fourth, and MOST IMPORTANT thing I would do, is advise the US government to save all bank by switching its car insurance to Geico.
Thanks, talking lizard.
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